Monastic Recreation: II
by Terrence Kardong, O.S.B.
What Makes Recreation So Hard?
What is it that makes recreation so hard? Why is it so difficult for a bunch of monks or nuns to maintain a lively custom of coming together regularly to enjoy each others’ company? Perhaps not all communities are finding recreation a problem, but I would wager that most communities in the USA have poorer attendance at recreation than they do at the liturgical services. Apparently, something that is supposed to be enjoyable is not exactly that for a lot of Benedictines.
Probably one of the complicating factors is the sheer repetitiveness of monastic recreation. This is not something we do once a week, like the Carthusians taking their Sunday walk. This is something we do every day, year in and year out. Further, it is the same people doing it. This is not a public coffee house or a place where you get a variety of participants. No, this is the same old faces night after night. It is like a family where you have the same folks at the dinner table rain or shine. For some people, this sameness seems to be a bit too much. In fact, there are monks (and I presume nuns) whose faces only light up when guests appear. Anything for a new face!
No doubt personality plays a big part in how people respond to recreation. To judge from appearances, some people do not like groups. They can communicate well one to one, but as for participating in a group conversation, well, forget it. Probably this kind of condition goes along with shyness. Not everybody finds it a comfortable thing to sit in a public place, especially if this involves revealing something of themselves. But if we don’t do that, it is hard to see how there can be any meaningful conversation. Still, there is nothing wrong from simply sitting and listening to others talk. In fact, people who have a lot to get off their chest at recreation can be burdensome to other people.
What actually happens in most monastic recreation rooms is that people pick up a newspaper or a magazine and take a look at it. Some monks actually read this stuff in the group, but not everybody can concentrate when other people are talking. Usually the reading material is just a sort of prop to hide behind if things get too boring. Sometimes people will notice curious things in the paper and that leads to conversation. One of our monks likes to quote the famous Dr. Gott on medical issues, and that provides an ideal opening for all the hypochondriacs in the room to make a report on their health.
Another topic of frequent comment is sports. At least a few of the monks follow their favorite teams on TV or in the paper, and so they tend to live and die with them. In some communities almost everybody finds sports fascinating, but our community is not one of them. Hence it is very easy to bore other people with sports commentary. Some people like to discuss the films that they watch on videos. Since some of our monks watch movies on Saturday night, these seem to provide popular conversation fodder. Other people are mostly interested in world events. None of us are experts on these matters, and that makes for more interesting conversations. Don’t confuse me with the facts, please!
But it cannot be denied that conversation can get old. In the restaurant, if a couple is actually conversing, they are most likely not married. What is left to say? It is just the same in the community. What is left to say? And St. Benedict makes it even worse when he says that we are not to bring home news and gossip from our trips outside the monastery. On this matter, we regularly break the Rule and without much compunction. If somebody experiences something unusual and interesting, it seems the monks are glad to hear about it. And if someone has just returned from, say, Europe, well, they get an extended hearing. Who does not want to tell somebody about what they have seen and heard?
At this point, someone might wonder if recreation ever involves spiritual conversation? The short answer is that it does not. The Rule of the Master, which was St. Benedict’s main source, does allow the monks to engage in such discourse—if the abbot is absent. But you certainly don’t hear much pious talk in a modern monastic recreation room. This could be because most of us are not very comfortable talking about such things in public, or at least in revealing our own spiritual condition. Nevertheless, if you listen closely you can hear subtle, indirect comments that do impinge on the spiritual life. Usually this will simply take the form of affirming one another.
Impediments to Recreation
One of the things that seem to take some of the steam out of our recreation is the simple fact that we now have conversation at some of our meals. We don’t talk at breakfast and not much at supper, but at lunch we gab away to our hearts’ content. That may not leave much to be said at recreation. And let’s face it, some people don’t feel a need to do a lot of talking. If they say two words at lunch, then that’s enough for them for the day. This goes especially for brothers or sisters who spend much of their workday talking. One can imagine that tour guides or professors are not looking for a lot more chatter in the evening.
Although talk at meals is not envisaged at all by the ancient monks’ Rules, it nevertheless is one of the staple elements of civilized life. The ability to converse over a meal is generally regarded as a hallmark of a well-socialized person. Nowadays we meet people who come from homes where there is no conversation at meals. They just stuff and run. If a decent cenobitic practice of table-talk can fill in that vacuum in a person’s background, it is doing a lot.
When we are talking about impediments to recreation, we should not leave out the way we feel. What if we are depressed or in a foul mood? Would it not be better to stay in our rooms and not inflict ourselves on others? No doubt there are times when a person should not feel required to spend time in public. But by and large, it should not matter too much how we feel when it comes to recreation. We should be willing to haul our sorry carcasses down to the rec room and spend a few minutes with the brethren or the sistern. By simply presenting ourselves, no matter how we feel, we are making our contribution to the “good of the order.” As Woody Allen once said: “80% of genius is just showing up.”
But someone might object that if we are in an antisocial mood, we probably are not going to get too much out of recreation. That may well be true, but it is also possible that we can contribute to someone else’s happiness. It could be that our brother is in a lonely or sad mood. All he needs are a few words to make him feel a little better. To push this matter of “getting something out” of recreation may be to miss the whole point. If enough people apply that standard to this monastic exercise, it probably will languish and expire. This could be one of the most serious problems for recreation in our society. If we look on it from a consumerist point of view, we will indeed ask “what can I get out of it?”
After all this rumination, we probably have to admit that monastic recreation is not just recreation as the “world” knows it. Although monks recreate for the same reason as everyone else, namely, to refresh their bodies and spirits, monastic recreation is an official community exercise. That means that it should be regarded as not just a privilege but a duty. To present myself at recreation and to interact with others is something I owe to the community. If I am absent from recreation, something is missing, someone is missing. Furthermore, if I ignore recreation I myself will pay a price. As the saying goes: “You pays your dues, or you sings the blues.” The price will eventually be loneliness and alienation. It is not good for man to be alone.
